My Experience With Miscarriage And Finding Spiritual Healing And Support

It is unfortunate that having a miscarriage is a very common experience for many women. Yet, it does not remove how devastating it is to lose a child, dramatically affecting almost every aspect of our lives. In this episode, host Yanet Borrego shares a very vulnerable and personal experience of her miscarriage and how she coped with the loss. The process of being at peace with it is very arduous. That is why opening up spaces to normalize conversations surrounding this aspect of life can help more women to talk about their experiences and be each other's comfort and support.

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My Experience With Miscarriage And Finding Spiritual Healing And Support

This episode is going to be very vulnerable. I'll be talking about the miscarriage I had at the end of July 2022. To be completely transparent with you, I was debating internally whether to share this or not. I was in a way, fearful of being judged or maybe thinking myself that this is a very personal thing to share. When I started digging deeper into why I wanted to share this, I realized that I needed to do this in a podcast episode, and I also shared it in a Story on Instagram.

Let me tell you my why. I want to make sure we normalize these conversations. Having a miscarriage, unfortunately, is something very common that many women experience. The more we talk about it, the more comfortable and supportive we are towards each other. Maybe what helped me processed this miscarriage may help you. I think this is a topic of conversation to have for women who want to be mothers, women who maybe are pregnant, and maybe women who don't want to be mothers and don't want to be pregnant.

It is interesting and also important to understand what we women struggle, and even for males, as our partners. Cody was with me during the whole process and everything happened in a blur to be honest. I'll be recounting a little bit of that. I wanted to share this to normalize these types of conversations to help other women that maybe are ashamed or afraid about these kinds of topics, or maybe they don't know that this is going to happen to them. If it happens, hopefully not, but if it happens, they're going to have this episode where I get to share what helped me. I get to share what I learned.

The other reason why I'm sharing it is because I made a commitment in my life and in my career to do things out of love, not out of fear. If I would have decided to not talk about this topic and not publish this episode, honestly it would have been out of fear, not out of love. I'm doing it out of love for all of you, my audience, because I think in the most vulnerable stories, that's where we get to learn the most. I'm here showing up for all of you and also for myself because it's important to lead with integrity in this beautiful path.

My Miscarriage Experience

To tell you a quick story, I'm not going to go into details of course, but I'll tell you some of it. A few weeks back, Cody and I realized that we were pregnant. It wasn't something that we were obsessively working on. It's something that happened, but of course we were ready in case it happened. I was extremely happy. We were very happy. I was five weeks and two days pregnant when I went to a gynecologist and he told me, but then I told Cody. He didn't go to that appointment.

Sometimes, we just suffer in silence due to shame or guilt.

The next week, I started to experience changes in my body, some bleeding. You bleed in a miscarriage and you bleed when you give birth. These are pretty common things. We bleed every month. I hope you're comfortable of me sharing this. I started experiencing some bleeding. I knew something was wrong the next day when I woke up and I didn't have any of the physical symptoms of pregnancy like soreness in my breasts. That's a very common one. I was still bleeding and even more. I was like, “Something is going on here.”

I called my gynecologist and then we went and he made an ultrasound. Everything looked relatively okay. He didn't see any bleeding internally or the integrity of the gestational sac. He didn't see it hard, which was interesting. He said, “Honestly, I don't know, let's see next week.” He made clear that the bleeding was very irregular and it wasn't a good sign. He didn't tell me I had a miscarriage, but he did tell me that it was possible, and that what I was experiencing wasn't a good sign.

I also remember I was in pain. I had cramps really badly. I'm like, “This doesn't feel comfortable at all.” On my mind, I knew miscarriages are very common. You're never prepared for that when it happens, but thankfully I had educated myself and I knew how common they are. If you google it, everyone is going to give you a different percentage, but around 10% to 25% of women experience miscarriage. Thankfully, when I was in my corporate job, I had met a couple of women who experienced miscarriage.

When I shared it on my Instagram Stories, a lot of women came forth. They are like, “I'm so sorry. I experienced the same.” I want to make this clear. It’s very common to have miscarriages. The first time I read about these was when I was reading the book from Michelle Obama, Becoming. She was talking about many miscarriages she had. She ended up using IVF. I thought to myself, “What a courageous and bold story to tell.” It was good to know because I didn't know these. This was a few years ago. I think I was with Cody. It wasn't long ago that I realized how common miscarriages were. That helped me like educating myself on understanding this is a possibility. I wasn't thinking about it, but I knew this could be a possibility.

Later that day, I came back from the gynecologist appointment. Cody was with me. The pains were incredibly worse. At that moment, that's when the miscarriage happened. I called my gynecologist and I told him what was going on. The lady from the office was like, “Go to the Emergency.” I'm like, “This is crazy.” I had canceled two coaching clients that I had that day because I had to prioritize my wellbeing. This was such a big reminder that it doesn't matter what you have in your business and your career. With the commitments that you have, you’ve got to prioritize your health over and over. At the end of the day, you are the foundation. I remember texting my clients, which were amazingly understanding because they know me that this is not something I do at all, with this exception.

That night, I had my last free masterclass. I was excited for it because I had a lot of people that signed up. I was like, “This is a great opportunity.” We ended up going to Emergency. They did a couple of hours of stories and everything. The masterclass time arrived and I was still in Emergency, so I had to send an email and cancel it. This was the first time that I've done that. This was a reminder that I needed to prioritize my health and also to process this mentally and emotionally.

We were in the Emergency room for hours. They did blood work. They did ultrasound of two different types. After everything was done, they came back and they're like, “Everything in your blood looks good, so you're good there. In the ultrasound, we didn't find anything. There is no baby anymore.” Even though I was going through this process, I always had the hope that somehow the baby was going to be there, even though I knew the possibility of the opposite was also true.

At that moment, that was the first time where I realized, “There is no baby anymore. I'm not pregnant anymore.” I cried. My husband was there with me. We went to dinner, but as you can imagine, I wasn't on the mood. It was such a humbling experience. I had many learnings. To even know that your body is doing what it's supposed to do, even if it's an undesired outcome like miscarriage, knowing that it was common helped me. Knowing people that the same thing happened to them and being able to talk to them about their stories was incredibly helpful for my mental and emotional healing.

Spirit Babies

When I knew I was pregnant, I also started reading this book that I heard years ago from a podcast I used to listen all the time. The podcast is called To Be Magnetic. It's about energy manifestation. The host was going through her pregnancy journey. Something that I appreciated about her was that she was sharing everything that was going on. I remember thinking, “That's impressive.” I feel sometimes we just suffer in silence due to shame or guilt or, “It's my fault,” thinking that way.

With her, I realized how important it is to be vulnerable and courageous to share these stories that may impact other people. In her journey, it was years trying to get pregnant. She did IVF. She did all these things. Finally, she now has a baby. On her journey, she talked about this book called Spirit Babies. I'm like, “That sounds really cool.” It's about communicating with the souls of the babies that you're meant to have.

We are in this life to get the lessons so we can move with more wisdom to our next life.

Since a child, I've loved energy and knowing our past lives. When I was 12 years old, I was reading a book on reincarnation. I wasn't raised religious at all, but to me that was more of a topic that was spiritual. One of the Laws of Thermodynamics based on scientific evidence, energy cannot be destroyed nor created. It can only be transformed. That's why I believe in souls leaving the body and coming back because everything is energy. When someone dies, there is an energy to it, there is a soul. What I believe, which may be different from your beliefs, and I’ve worked with clients from different religions and I respect everyone's model of the world. I'm just sharing in this episode my experience.

What I believe is that the souls come back to get different learning, so they can level even more on a spiritual sense. We are in this life to get the lessons and the learning so we can move with more wisdom to our next life. There is a moment that we up-level so much that we get all the lessons and then we don't come back in physical form anymore. Anyways, that's my belief. It's personal to me.

I'm telling you this because this book is about these souls that decide to come back to Earth as babies. He talks about these souls from the Spirit Babies that they choose specific parents that they want to spend their Earthly lives with because those parents are going to give them the lessons that they need to learn in order to up-level. He talked about miscarriage in that book.

You might be thinking how this guy knows all of these. This guy is a clairvoyant, he's a medium. Somehow, he has the gift to communicate specifically with spirit babies, with the souls of those babies coming into the Earth. The book is called Spirit Babies. I highly recommend it. If you want to be a mom, or if you want to know about the topic, even if you don't believe in past lives, it doesn't matter. It's a really enlightening book.

In part of the book, he talks about miscarriage and he talks about the spirit babies, the souls of the babies not wanting the mother to feel like it's their fault. If you look at yourself, miscarriage has nothing to do with you 99% of the time. It means that the baby was not forming properly. There was a chromosome or a genetic issue. It wasn’t meant to be formed. What that book explains is that whenever that happens, which has nothing to do with the mother, and that's why I didn't take it personally because I was being so careful in everything. When that happens, the soul of the baby goes back to the spirit babies’ world and waits because the soul is determined to come with you as his or her family. Souls don't have genders, but when they come, they decide to come as a boy or a girl.

When the soul leaves the body, which by the way, babies in the womb don't experience death as we do after we have fully come into this Earthly world. I'm telling you what he's explaining, and I truly believe in this too. When the soul leaves the body of their gestational sac, the baby in your womb, which is really small, it goes back to the spirit world and it awaits for the next vessel or body to start forming in the body, and it enters the body. I truly believe that the soul is there waiting for the next moment of pregnancy.

This book truly helped me in gaining a greater understanding of what happens in the spiritual sense. This book helped me to remain spiritually grounded, which as a consequence helped me to achieve mental and emotional clarity in those moments. I cried, yes. On Sunday, we went to hot yoga, which was one of the things that I was avoiding because overheating can be concerning on the pregnancy. Coming back to the first thing I was avoiding, because I knew I was pregnant, I remember that morning I cried. I'm like, “This means I'm not pregnant, the fact that I'm going to a hot yoga.” It's just interesting the meanings that your mind assigns to all of these things.

I did hot yoga and I felt so much healing and completion energy, knowing that I'm healing and I'm recovering. The day after the miscarriage, I physically felt so much better. I was in a lot of pain on that Wednesday, but I felt so much better mentally, emotionally, physically, and spiritually. I was working with a new client. We were having a breakthrough session and she's like, “I'm so impressed with your mental and emotional strength. I'm pretty sure it's because of your spiritual foundation.” That was a first time someone put it that way, but when I look on her comment, it is true. The fact that I had a greater understanding about energy and the soul's journey, even that book that I'm mentioning, Spirit Babies, helped me immensely to make peace and accept what had happened.

As I mentioned too, knowing what to prioritize, my business or my health. That was such a good reminder. Thankfully, I prioritized my health and I canceled everything I had that day. I felt good enough for the next day to continue working. As you know, I'm doing what I love with coaching and teaching, so it also helped me heal a lot, being in a place where I get energized and excited for everything that I'm doing. That was super helpful.

Also knowing people that had gone through this journey. If you don't know anyone, then you know me, and I'm letting you know that you can reach out to me on Instagram or via email or anything if you're going through something similar and you need someone to talk to. That's the whole purpose of this episode to normalize what a lot of people feel ashamed of and guilty about. To know that this is not you. This miscarriage happened not because of our fault. As I mentioned, something wasn't forming well, and the body knew what to do. We’ve got to trust our bodies and trust the soul's journey.

I hope this was super helpful for all of you. As I mentioned at the beginning of the episode, I was struggling. I'm like, “Should I share this?” This feels so vulnerable, but I'm doing this out of love because I want to share more of these vulnerable experiences. In social media, as you know, we always share the highlights. We always share the best thing. There are ups and downs in every person's lives. There are things that they don't share. There are things that sometimes we feel ashamed of. I'm here to remind you that we are all walking the same platform. We are all on the same journey.

I shared these in my social media. A lot of you, my audience, my clients, you were so kind reaching out and saying, “I'm sorry for your loss,” and giving me all the love and support. That helped tremendously too. I really appreciate all of you for sharing this journey with me and for allowing me to share my story, so hopefully it can help more people. If you need anything, I'm just one email or one message away from social media. I hope this was informational and helpful in your journey. I hope you have a wonderful rest of your day. I'll see you next time.

Important Links

• Becoming
• To Be Magnetic
• Spirit Babies
• https://Calendly.com/yanetbcoaching/clarity-call
• https://www.YBCoaching.com/wellness5minsroutine 
• https://www.Facebook.com/yanetbcoaching
• https://www.Instagram.com/yanetbcoaching/ 
• https://www.LinkedIn.com/company/yanet-borrego-coaching/?viewAsMember=true
• https://www.YouTube.com/channel/UCqxL829o0Vk-QdY12F-GgMw