The answer to the "I can't find my keys…" dilemma
Aug 30, 2021
How many times have you told yourself "I can't find my keys" only to realize that they were in front of you the whole time? In this blog, I provide you with the solution to this persistent problem.
Our brains experience an average of 60,000 - 80,000 thoughts per day - approximately 42-56 thoughts per minute -, of which 80% are negative. Around 95% of these thoughts are exactly the same ones we experienced the previous day, and the day before, and the day before that one, and the day before prior to that one… well… you get the dynamic. Of course, we are very familiar with this pattern since we experience it every single day. Often we become frustrated with ourselves because we may not be getting the results we desire.
Gaining awareness and understanding of how the subconscious -or unconscious- mind works is a key enabler to break this behavioral pattern.
What we focus on determines our thoughts and beliefs, and sequentially our results. In the book, "Flow" the author, Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi, mentions that our subconscious mind processes 2 million bits per second of information, it's a super mega computer! Of those, we can only process 126 bits per second in our conscious mind. This means that consciously we can only process 0.0063% of all the information we become exposed to. A lot of this information, we delete, distort, and/or generalize.
Have you ever been looking for your keys, and even though they were in front of you the whole time, you just didn't see them? It doesn't matter how many times you looked, you swear they were not there when you did. You become convinced that there is a magical elf in your house who loves to hide your keys every time you are about to leave the house.
This magical elf is not external to you, it's actually your own mind. This example illustrates perfectly the phenomena described earlier. Your conscious mind didn't see the keys even though they were there. When you finally decided to relax and look for them carefully, you found them. You were probably in a hurry or stressed over finding the keys and your conscious was focused on "I am going to be late", "I can’t find the keys", "I've lost the keys" instead of the desired outcome of actually finding the keys.
This is a very critical piece of information because it exposes the reality that what you focus on, you experience. If you focus on "I can't find the keys", guess what? You will not see the keys even if they are in front of you. If you are focusing on your limitations, you will not have space to focus on your potential and its possibilities.
Day by day we decide on what we focus on, those 126 bits determine whether we see the cup half empty or half full. We don't experience an objective reality, we can only experience "our reality". What we perceive is filtered through our values, beliefs, and past experiences. Everything in our lives is a matter of perception. The key part is to become conscious of the unconscious so we can start breaking those undesired patterns.
To replace any undesired behaviors, patterns, or states, I religiously follow this process with myself and my coaching clients: (1) become aware of any undesired behavior, beliefs, thoughts, or states (2) determine how these are limiting instead of empowering, (3) determine the necessary shifts to create an empowering behavior, belief, thoughts, or state (hint: focus on what you want instead of what you don't want) (4) take consistent daily action to improve your focus, and therefore your results
The next time you are looking for your keys, take a deep breath and tell yourself: I can find the keys, they are already here.
Let's Connect! Please see important links below:
FREE Resources:
Starting your day without direction? Start your morning on purpose with my go-to 5 mins routine.
Need Clarity? 3 Simple Questions to boost your clarity and make authentic decisions that lead to fulfilling outcomes. You also have journaling space for each question so you can capture your insights.
Stay connected with news and updates!
Join our mailing list to get resources, motivation, and upcoming events delivered to your inbox.
Don't worry, your information will not be shared.
We hate SPAM. We will never sell your information, for any reason.
